On day 34 of my Final Fantasy Marathon, I finished Edward’s Tale and started Kain’s Tale, leaving off as Ceodore and the Hooded Man were climbing the mountain east of Mist. Today, I finish Kain’s Tale.

Ceodore falls off something else

You may remember that Ceodore previously fell off a bridge. This time, he’s falling down the side of a mountain.

However, he seems to be unhurt. The Hooded Man hops down the mountain after him.

Ceodore says he is sorry and the Hooded Man tells him to be more careful next time. We find a Flame Shield, which goes to Ceodore.

We make it to the bottom of the mountain and Ceodore can’t believe he made it one piece. The Hooded Man tells him he should believe in himself more.

We see Kain’s airship approaching Damcyan. Kain is onboard gleefully anticipating his chance to kill Cecil.

The Hooded Man identifies the airship as the Red Wings and Ceodore gets pissed. He says the soldiers on that airship are just mindless drones not Red Wings.

Ceodore thinks they are after them, but the Hooded Man says it looks like they are headed for Damcyan. He tells Ceodore there is no time to lose and they must head to Kaipo.

The duality of Kain

Back on the airship, Kain is flashing back to his battle with himself in the Mirror Room. We see the version of Kain that stepped out of the mirror defeat the real Kain.

Not Kain celebrates his freedom. Back on the airship, Kain gloats over having Fabul’s Crystal.

Kaipo

The Hooded Man and Ceodore arrive at Kaipo and the Hooded Man says they should rest at the inn. That night, some Baron soldiers show up at the inn and attack.

We defeat them easily and Ceodore asks who they were. The Hooded Man says they weren’t human anymore.

He advises Ceodore not to show them mercy just because they’re from Baron or he’ll end up just like them. He says they need to stay on the move and at daybreak they will make for the Underground Waterway.

The fucking Underground Waterway

Yay. We are in the fucking Underground Waterway again. We find an Ice Shield, which goes to Ceodore.

We also find some Adamantite. The Hooded Man decides to rest at a save point. Ceodore objects, saying he is just fine.

The Hooded Man tells him he needs to pace himself, because we have a while to go before we get out of this fucking waterway. The scene shifts to Kain’s airship landing at Damcyan Castle.

Damcyan Castle

Kain tells the zombie soldiers to wait on the airship. When they try to insist on coming along, he says he knows they are being controlled, but they could at least value their lives a little.

Kain enters Damcyan Castle and finds Edward sitting on his throne. Edward says he never expected to see Kain there.

The scene shifts to Ceodore sleeping in the fucking waterway. He calls out for his mother and the Hooded Man looks sad.

Back in the fucking waterway

The Hooded Man and Ceodore continue through the fucking waterway. They fight a Mythril Golem in a monster-in-a-box encounter to get the Ice Brand.

He’s pretty tough compared to the other monsters we’ve been fighting, but a few Cross Slash bands take him down. We get some Flame Mail from another chest that goes to the Hooded Man.

Ceodore is understandably excited to see daylight, but the Hooded Man harshes his buzz. He says we aren’t through with the fucking waterway yet.

Back at Damcyan Castle

The scene shifts back to the throne room at Damcyan Castle. Kain thanks Edward for clearing the room for him and asks him to extend his kindness to handing over the Fire Crystal.

Edward questions whether that is really what Kain is after. Kain says it’s not his primary goal, but it is the thrust of his current business.

Edward presses Kain to say what he’s really after and Kain tells him he is going to kill Cecil. Edward asks if Kain has seen Cecil yet and Kain says no.

Edward refuses to hand over the Crystal. Kain threatens to kill Edward and Rosa shows up telling him to stop.

Stop being a puss Ceodore

The scene shifts to the Subterranean Lake, where Ceodore sees the giant waterfall and declares they have hit a dead end. The Hooded Man asks Ceodore if he has the guts to jump in.

Ceodore says of course he does and they jump down the waterfall. The scene shifts back to the throne room.

She’s not that into you Kain

Rosa asks Kain if his mind is being controlled again and he says it isn’t. He adds that once he kills Cecil, Rosa will be his.

That’s not how that works, Kain. The zombie troops arrive and Kain demands the Crystal one last time.

Edward refuses and opens the box Cecil gave him. Bombs fly out of the box and kill the zombie troops.

Kain recognizes it as a Carnelian Signet. Kain attacks Edward while Rosa looks on.

Kain defeats Edward easily and takes the Fire Crystal. He menacingly backs Rosa up against the wall and the scene shifts back to the waterfall.

Octokraken

Ceodore spots an exit behind the waterfall, but the Hooded Man tells him to hold up. An Octokraken attacks.

This monster hits pretty hard with his magic, but a few Cross Slash bands take him down. Ceodore says that was intense and the Hooded Man says he fears the worst if this is how violent the monsters are getting.

The fucking Red Wings again

As they leave the fucking waterway, Ceodore and the Hooded Man see the fucking Red Wings’ ship taking off from Damcyan and realize they are too late to save the Crystal.

The scene shifts to Kain and Rosa on the airship. Kain says his work in Damcyan is done. Rosa tells him to stop the madness.

Cid flies in on the Enterprise and attempts to shoot the Red Wing ship down, but it flies away. The scene shifts to Ceodore and the Hooded man and they make a run for the Castle.

Damcyan Castle again

Ceodore and the Hooded Man find Cid in the throne room with Edward. Cid is relieved to find Ceodore still alive.

Ceodore asks after his mother and Edward apologizes. Cid says he should have stayed with her.

Edward tells Ceodore that Kain took Rosa. The Hooded Man is very upset and orders everyone to the Enterprise right now.

What a drag

Rosa asks Kain why he is doing what he is doing. He goes full mustachio-twirling villain and rambles about how he has reserved a front-row seat for Rosa to watch Cecil die.

On the Enterprise, Ceodore says this can’t be happening. He heard so much about Kain’s noble deeds, and this is how he turns out?

Edward tries to reassure him by saying he doubts Kain would lay a hand on Rosa, but Cecil, on the other hand… Way to make the kid feel better Edward.

The Hooded Man urges Cid to go faster. Back on the Red Wing ship, Kain is still losing his shit.

He tells Rosa that she is going to see him walk right up to Cecil and tear him limb from limb. They exit the airship and Kain tells the guards to get out of the way and they do.

He then proceeds to drag Rosa into the Castle. Cid lands the Enterprise and everyone but Edward rushes to the Castle.

Kain continues to act crazy, slowly dragging Rosa to the throne room. The guards refuse to let the Hooded Man and company in, so they must fight their way inside.

Kain vs Kain

Ceodore and the rest catch up to Kain outside the throne room. The Hooded Man and Kain square off.

Rosa calls the Hooded Man, “Kain” and questions who Not Kain is. Not Kain says he is the real Kain and all you other Kains are just imitating.

Not Kain challenges Kain to a fight. Ceodore tries to join, but Kain tells him to stay back and he does.

The pair battle and Not Kain says that Kain wanted Cecil dead so he could have Rosa for himself. Rosa and Ceodore try to stop the fight, but Kain tells them to stand back.

He picks up a spear and regains his Jump ability. The rest of the fight is a jump-off, decided mostly by who has the best timing.

Kain wins and Not Kain can’t believe it. Kain says he is ready to accept Not Kain as a part of himself now.

Not Kain asks why. Kain says he has been held back by his past. He has realized that he must accept his past, rather than try to bury it.

Not Kain collapses. Rosa kneels near him and does something and he disappears, leaving the Water, Wind, and Fire Crystals behind.

Holy Dragoon

Kain hear’s the voice of Cecil’s father telling him this is justice. He seems to be asking Kain to help his sons.

The voice transforms Kain into something like a cross between a Dragoon and a Paladin. He gets a fancy new set of armor and a ponytail.

Ceodore remarks that he looks like a paladin. The gang all welcome Kain back. The group, minus Edward, who is in the castle now, but again doesn’t join the party, walk into the throne room to confront Cecil.

Cecil greets them all. Kain’s Tale ends.

The Lunarians’ Tale: Prologue

The start screen for the Lunarians Tale says that after the great battle, the Lunarians embarked on an endless journey, slumbering until the time was right. However, one of them has awoken from a nightmare, only to find the moon’s Crystals brimming with a foreboding red light.

Cecil misses his bro

Cecil is gazing out the window at the solo moon. Rosa asks if he is looking for Golbez again. They both wonder how he is doing.

Rosa asks if Cecil thinks Ceodore is safe and he says he has Biggs and Wedge with him. He adds that she doesn’t need to worry about Ceodore because he understands.

Rosa asks what he understands. Cecil says that destiny is something you create for yourself.

The moon arrives

The scene shifts to the astronomer and his apprentice. They observe the second moon arriving.

Golbez gets woke

The scene shifts again to Golbez having a nightmare about battling Cecil. He wakes in some kind of pod, dressed like the mysterious “Man in Black” we met in Rydia’s Tale.

I walk around checking the other sleeping pods and find a Lustful Lali-Ho and Fusoya’s pod empty. Golbez enters the Lunar Subterrain and senses a disturbance in the force.

I find some Adamantite in a chest. There are no random encounters yet, but there are a handful of scripted battles, each preceded by an ominous sound.

I find and equip some Mythril Gloves. Golbez says the disturbance he senses is growing stronger as he makes his way through the Subterrain.

Seems bad

Golbez enters the Crystal Palace and sees that all of the Crystals have turned blood red. When I interact with them, they say cryptic things about the rightful possessor.

FuSoYa walks in. He says something beyond our understanding is happening. We decide to go investigate the moon.

Surface of the moon

I find a Blood Sword in a chest and equip it on Golbez. At Hummingway Home, the Hummingways tell us about a meteor strike to the east, near Bahamut’s Lair. Uh oh.

I purchase some supplies and then go looking for the crash site.

Meteor crash site

We find the meteor crash site and Golbez says it is eating away at the land like a parasite. FuSoYa concludes this was no normal meteor.

I find a Mythril Sword and equip it on Golbez. We encounter the Mysterious Girl. She immediately demands the location of the moon’s crystals.

When we don’t answer her, she says she’ll have plenty of time to search after she obliterates us. However, this time she has bitten off more than she can chew.

Finally, the bitch is dead

We finally get a battle against the Mysterious Girl that we can win. She summons Asura.

Golbez asks why she is summoning the Eidolons, but of course, she doesn’t answer. Asura continuously heals and buffs the Mysterious Girl, so after I cast slow on her, I cast reflect, so that Asura’s spells bounce back onto my party.

I then wipe out the Mysterious Girl with Golbez’s attacks and FuSoYa’s Meteor spell. Mostly Meteor though.

It ignores reflect and does a ton of damage. Golbez remarks that the Mysterious Girl was stronger than her appearance suggests.

FuSoYa wonders why she would be summoning Eidolons. We decide we should go see Bahamut.

On the way out of the crash site, I find and equip a Diamond Armlet.

Lair of the Father

We walk over to the Lair of the Father. I find an Aura Staff in a chest and give it to FuSoYa. At two points along the path, I must defeat a giant Marlboro Spider.

FuSoYa does the heavy lifting with his Flare spells. When we reach Bahamut, we find that he has been petrfied.

FuSoYa examines Bahamut and says that his body and soul are shackled in another dimension. We conclude that if Bahamut could be captured, then the rest of the Eidolons may have also been captured.

FuSoYa says we must hurry to the Crystal Palace. He is afraid something is going to happen to the Crystals.

Day late and a dollar short

When we get back to the Crystal Palace, we find that the light has left the Crystals. The Mysterious Girl appears.

She thanks us for leading her here. We attack her. She summons Leviathan. This battle goes about the same as the previous one.

I cast slow on the Mysterious Girl and then bombard her with Flare and Bio until she expires. Golbez wonders if the girl is immortal.

FuSoYa says he can’t say, but he is certain that the Blue Planet’s Crystals are in danger. He instructs Golbez to join him in prayer so that they can call the Lunar Whale.

The palace begins violently shaking. Another Mysterious Girl appears. We realize that rather than being immortal, there is more than one of her.

She tells us she no longer needs us or the Crystals. She then grabs the dead Mysterious Girl and disappears.

Comrades in danger

FuSoYa concludes that their comrades in statis are in danger. We rush to the moon’s core.

I find an Icebrand and Ice Armor and equip them on Golbez. The Luminous Robe goes to FuSoYa.

I find a Soma Drop, which I save for later. As we progress through the Lunar Subterrain, the Crystals shatter one-by-one.

Golbez and FuSoYa begin to panic about reaching the people on the Blue Planet in time. KluYa adds his prayers to theirs and we see the scene where the Mysidian Elder declares the Dragon is Crying and the Lunar Whale rises from the ocean and travels to the moon.

RIP Crystals

The final Crystal shatters and the palace begins to shake. FuSoYa says that with the Crystals gone, there is nothing left to hold Zeromus back any longer.

He tells Golbez if they both fail, the Lunarians and the Blue Planet have no hope. He tells Golbez he understands what needs to be done.

The pair learn the Double Black Magic band. Zeromus’ Malice emerges. We wail on him with our new band until he casts his Big Bang attack, knocking us both down to single digit HP.

FuSoYa tells Golbez it is time and teleports him out of the battle. The scene shifts to a series of flashbacks from FFIV involving Golbez, leaving FuSoYa’s fate a mystery.

Another potato baby

After the scenes from FFIV, we see young Golbez, then called Theodor, standing over Cecil when he was just a potato baby. He hears the voice of Zemus telling him that he must hate his brother.

After all, if it weren’t for Cecil, his parents would be alive. Theodor denies this.

The voice calls him a vile little insect birthed from the womb of a dragon’s corpse. Rude.

Theodor tells the voice to stop talking to him. Golbez wakes on the Lunar Whale. He sees the second moon approach Earth and says his brother’s name and his tale ends.

That’s where I stopped for the night.